When I started this site my brand manager and site moderator made one thing very clear “people troll the internet to bring others down, be prepared”. So I made peace with not being able to please everyone a long ass time ago. Everyone has an opinion that they are entitled to, and their opinion does not have to side with yours. That’s life. However, I did not expect someone that I know to go online at 11:30 am on a Wednesday, at work, to make a fake name and email address just to drop some pure hate my way. That’s a lot of work to tell me that “my site isn’t fooling anyone but myself”. Might I also point out that with today’s technology it is very simple to enter the IP address, find coordinates and google map that shit. No need for the name change. The jig is up.
We all have girls like this in our lives. Maybe you work with them, go to school with them, or maybe they were once a friend and you had a falling out. Whatever the case may be, we have all had someone like this cross our paths. Someone that considers it “fake” to be able to smile and say hi because you don’t want drama or a royal rumble at every get together you’re at. I call it mean girl syndrome. Mean girl syndrome is usually when someone will take the time out of their day to try to make someone feel bad about themselves. Bitch syndrome is different, they will do the same things, but instead of making a fake email and name they will sign it with their real name and throw their number on the bottom. A bitch is going to stand behind her actions because she truly believes in them. A mean girl will play games and be more sneaky with their shenanigans.
Ever since my son started school this year I have thanked heaven numerous times that he wasn’t born a girl. Boys are different. If they have a fight they throw a couple of punches and it’s usually forgotten about. That’s not how us women work. I know this because I’m guilty of it myself, or at least I have been in the past. Girls can fight, make up, and still hold the grudge for fifteen years. The best part is, we don’t really need a good reason. We can start a Third World War over hair color or because someone bought the same pair of pants. I don’t know why we do it, but we need to cut it the fuck out. Especially when we are still doing it over the age of twenty five.
When I read comments like that now it doesn’t make me angry. It makes me think that I’m married, thirty three years old with a five year old and still dealing with this. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a victim. I deserve some karma and to have people dislike me for sure. I will own that. I have made a shit ton of mistakes involving other people and their feelings. That kind of thinking also comes with age. Fighting isn’t appealing anymore. There comes a point where you just want to get along to go along. It’s easier. Unless it’s absolutely important and involves my friends or family, I will always choose to just walk away.
I wish that I could tell the girls in school that are just figuring out who they are and who they want to be that you can’t impress everyone. Some people just aren’t going to like you. They are going to be vocal about it. They are going to find flaws in your personality, in the way you look, and in the way you live your life. I want to tell you that at the end of the day it doesn’t matter. Those people will be there at every stage. Judging, hating and talking. Take it with a grain of salt. If you focus on the people that don’t like you, then all that’s doing is taking focus off of the people that actually do. It’s hard and it sucks but if you allow yourself to sink down to their level then you will be one step closer to becoming exactly the person you don’t want to be…..them.
At the end of the day you have to be true to yourself. Dress how you want to. Be friends with who you want to. Accept your quirks and your flaws. Chances are that even if you lived your life perfectly and up to their standards, you would still be doing something wrong in their eyes. We all make mistakes, god knows I sure have and I regret a lot of them. I however am not or will ever be perfect. I’m fully well aware I couldn’t be perfect even if I tried. So enjoy yourself, enjoy your life and enjoy the people that want to be in it with you. That’s all that matters.
Love your blog! Just keep doing a great job, the haters are Always going to be out there!, Pity
Thank you much Sande! I’m so happy that you’re enjoying it. Thank you so much for the kind message, I really appreciate it! I know that hateful people will always be out there, but kind messages like yours are the exact reason why people keep going and are able to push past them. xoxoxo
Oh I needed that!
I’m trying to go big (well at least branch out a little bit) with my blog and I receive ZERO support from some of my family. Couple of them are on board but when I see other bloggers who’s mother’s tweet their posts and sisters FB them, I get a little discouraged. Yep, people may not like or understand what I’m doing but it’s their problem not mine.
I want to do what I like and thank you for writing this!
happymedley.blogspot.com
Thank you! I’m happy that reading it might help to power through some of the negativity you might be feeling. Just remember that you can keep going and feel bad sometimes because of other people or you can quit and feel bad anyway. Sometimes you just have to focus on your goals and put the naysayers in the back of your mind. Thank you for the message and good luck! Xoxoxo